Old school dating: First comes love, then marriage

Jessica Stubbs | Staff Writer

I’m sure we’ve all heard the phrase “why buy the cow if you can get the milk for free?”  However, why would a man, in my case, want to marry me if I’m doing all the things that a girlfriend and a wife does? I totally understand that times have changed and we have different values than our parents, etc., but there are some benefits of keeping things old school.

For your whole life you’ve, lived with someone whether it be your parents, siblings, cousins, grandparents, and now your roommate.  Believe it or not, we all need our personal space at some point.  Living alone gives you the personal space to do literally whatever you want, and it teaches you how to be disciplined and hold yourself accountable.  There’s no one to split the energy bill with or take the trash out every other week.  You are completely independent.  When the time comes to move in with your husband/wife, you’re perfectly capable of taking care of business whether it be paying bills or doing chores. Also, you know the importance of alone time.

I might get a lot of backlash from this, but hear me out.  If someone asks you out, it is his/her intent to basically impress you.  With that being said, he/she comes up with the date plans and courts you.  Many of us don’t know what that means, because our generation just doesn’t do it. Courting someone is getting to know another person before taking it any further.

“I think they’re a lot better and you don’t end up ‘catching feelings’ too early and one person gets attached and the other doesn’t. I think the only reason to date is to find your spouse and I think this is the best way to find one.” said Traemani Hawkins, a sophomore in computer science

Sex is important in a relationship, but not as important as knowing that pepperoni is my favorite pizza topping, but I digress.  The first date is meant for you to be impressed and get to know the other person. So, since the other person initiated the date, they have to follow all the way through, including the check.

This brings me to my cow reference.  If you pull out all of your tricks for your boyfriend/girlfriend, what is there to experiment or to surprise them with when you both decide to get married?  Think of yourself as a sheet cake at a party (like I said, hear me out).  

Some people will take those big corner pieces while others take small, conservative pieces out of the middle.  By the time that special guest of honor come to get their piece of cake, what is left?  Save something to look forward to in the future.  

With all this, I understand that marriage is not the end goal for some people, and that’s okay.  Not everyone values the same things, but these points go beyond the “old school versus new school” dating debate.  These points are also here to remind you that you are worth it.  Learn to love yourself, and understand what you bring to the table. Then, if someone wants you as badly as they say they want you then they’d stop at nothing to win your heart.  And with that being said, Happy Valentine’s Day, Wolfpack!